How to avoid intimidating others

13 Sep

That is, each of us finds different people intimidating. Wingert helps her clients realize that they can choose to feel secure (instead of intimidated), “regardless of the situation and who else is in it.” Here are six tips to try.1. The first step to being assertive is knowing yourself and your values, said Hanks, director of Wasatch Family Therapy and author of .She’s found that most people who have a hard time acting assertively haven’t reflected on what they think, feel, need and want.“If you have uncertainty or don’t have conviction about what you want to express, it’s really difficult to behave assertively.”To get clarity, she suggested simply asking yourself questions, like the below, on a regular basis: Hanks also recommended using a feelings word list to describe how you’re currently feeling. It means expressing your thoughts, feelings, needs and wants in a relationship, said psychologist Julie de Azevedo Hanks, Ph. However, many of us have a hard time being assertive with certain people. Maybe it’s someone you perceive as more powerful or even “better” than you.Either way, one thing is clear: You find yourself being passive and unable to speak your truth. According to psychotherapist Michelle Farris, LMFT, “over time, not speaking up makes you feel like a doormat.” This sinks your self-esteem, sets you up to be a victim and makes you feel powerless, she said.

Does someone you know bring out these feelings in you?

Actually, even if you didn’t want it, I was happy to give it to you anyway.

Here are some cuts from the soul-destroying album that played on repeat in my brain every time I walked into a room: These beliefs ruled most of my adult life, and the results of these beliefs were devastating.

Intimidating look " data-medium-file="https://leadershipfreak.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/file391291214178.jpg? w=300" data-large-file="https://leadershipfreak.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/file391291214178.jpg? w=480" class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-13847" alt="Owl" src="https://leadershipfreak.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/file391291214178.jpg? w=620&h=349" srcset="https://leadershipfreak.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/file391291214178480w, https://leadershipfreak.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/file391291214178.jpg? w=150&h=84 150w, https://leadershipfreak.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/file391291214178.jpg? w=300&h=169 300w" sizes="(max-width: 480px) 100vw, 480px" / Leadership by influence, rather than intimidation, is noble but messy.

Unwillingness to acknowledge the perception of others prevents you from dealing with unintended intimidation.